
These Are The Best Tweets Of The Week
It's been another absolute classic.
First, something to make you feel all warm inside.
�� HAPPY COUPLES ONLY �� pic.twitter.com/bQrGVpjGte
— Rob Damiani (@RobDamiani) September 7, 2017
Gonna start using this one.
whenever jamia bakes cookies Lily comes in the kitchen &asks "what smells so good?!" my response is always "i've been standing here farting"
— frnkiero: Party Dad (@FrankIero) September 3, 2017
How gREAT IS COFFEEEE
guys i got a double shot coffee today and i'm PINGIN what're you up to how're the kids are you followings your DREAMS
— jayden seeley (@jaydenwithcon) September 6, 2017
Less said about this the better.
I wish my butthole what stop doing what it is doing so I could get back to being handsome in front of cameras.
— Danny Worsnop (@dannyworsnop) September 2, 2017
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Whoops. Sorry I'm not fulfilling my one true duty in life of pleasing you. https://t.co/nxOTZlkBe3
— Chrissy Costanza (@ChrissyCostanza) September 5, 2017
This claim...
Apparently, @joshwithcon keeps a list in his phone of reasons why the moon landing is fake in case it ever comes up in casual conversation.
— Gina Arielle (@GinaArielle) September 5, 2017
Met with this completely serious answer.
not saying the moon landing itself was ~definitely~ fake but the footage and images that were presented to the public definitely are.
— josh brozzesi (@joshwithcon) September 5, 2017
Why deny yourself perfection?
Top tip for any aspiring chefs: 20 chicken nugget share box - £3.99
— Alex Adam (@alexjamesadam) September 6, 2017
Sing along!
We're going down down
— [email protected]®|{ µø₽₽û§��️�� (@markhoppus) September 8, 2017
Getting killed by a clown
& sugar this circus is shitty
I'll be ur # 1 w/a mullet
Sexy logride guy stuck in a ball pit
A balanced start to the day.
Beer for dinner
— SLiME DADDY (@FRONZ1LLA) September 4, 2017
We certainly hope not!
I've run out of tweets.
— Alexander William (@AlexAllTimeLow) September 3, 2017
And to conclude, how all dreams should be.
just woke from a dream where i was taking out allllllll the trash and every bit of that garbage was in checkerboard patterned trash bags...
— hayley from Paramore (@yelyahwilliams) September 8, 2017
... and i didnt just take it out, i flung it high in the air and across the street to where it landed on top of other folks' garbage.
— hayley from Paramore (@yelyahwilliams) September 8, 2017
honestly, that trash was sparkling in the sun. my garbage was glorious. if this ain't a metaphor...... oh and btw good morning.
— hayley from Paramore (@yelyahwilliams) September 8, 2017